Monday, April 6, 2015

comedy status for whatsapp SMS And Funny Jokes Masti SMS

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Ladka: Mai tumhara lia aangaro paar chal sakta hu,
Ladki: Kya tum mujhsa itna pyaar karta ho, chalo khai se ghum kar aatai ha
Ladka: Paagl hogai ha kya…..dhup dheka ha kitni taaz ha..Marna haa kya

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Arz kiya hai….jara gaur farmaiya ga
Shayri likhna koi masti nahi
Shayri likhna koi masti nahi
Shayri karna koi sasti nahi
Aur jo ladki tumare samne hasti nahi
Samjho ke wo brush barabar karti nahi.

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Ek murgi market gayi aur….
kaha- Ek aanda dena.
Dukandar- Tum aanday ka kya karogi?
Murgi- Mere Husband Ne kaha 6 Rs ke liya aapna figure kharab mat karo.

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TEACHER: “Kabir ka koi Doha Sunao..?”
.
.
.
Pappu: “Kabiro Saalo Bewkoof, Doha Diyo Banaye, Khud To Saalo Khisak Gayo, Manne Diyo Fasae…..

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Husband To wife – “Wow Darling.., The House is So clean..!!! Was the Whatsapp Server down
today…???”
Wife : No
Husband : (surprised !!!)
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Wife : I lost my phone charger, had to put
things in place to look for it…

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Husband: Raja Dasarath Ke 3 Rani Thi.
Wife: To Kya?
Husband: To Mai 2 Shaadiyan Aur Kar Sakta Hu.
Wife: Draupadi Ka Naam Suna Hai?
Husband: Tu Bhi Na Pagli Dil Pe Le Leti Hai!

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Pappu Dabang dekh kar aya.
School mein sir : Pappu tumhare sare ans galat hein marks de to kahan den ?
Pappu : KAMAL KARTE HaiN MASTER JI.MARKS HI TO MANG RAHE HAIN,
CHUP CHAP DE DO WARNA THAPAR MAR K BHI LAY SKTE HAIN.
Sir : Badtamiz
Pappu : BADTAMIZ SE YAAD AYA,AAP K PAPA KAISE HAIN ?
Sir : Nikal ja meri class se,
Pappu : CHUP CHAP SE MARKS DE DO WARNA ANS SHEET ME ITNE CHED KARENGE K
CONFUSE HO JAOGE K MARKS KaHAn DEN OR ZERO KAHAN DAIN..!

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Bhagwan ne kaha: 5 doston ko chhod de toh 50 lakh cash dunga.
Aur Sabhi doston ko chhod de toh Ferrari dunga.
Maine Bhagwan ko dekha aur kaha, Hey Bhagwan.
Yeh dost wo hain jinhone meri har khushi har gam mein saath diya.
Mere bachpan se lekar aaj tak mere saath rahe.
Kabhi main roya to apne hathon se mere ansoo pochhe.
Ek glass pani bhi piya to bhi mere saath share kiya.
Meri ek awaz par daude chale aaye.
Aur aap kehte ho ki mein ek “FERRARI” ke liye inhe chhod dun?
KHAIR, Koi baat nahi.
Lekin “FERRARI” Red color ki hi dena

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3 log marne k bad swarg k
darwaze par pahuche…
1st bola : me pujari hu maine aapki
zindagi bhar sewa ki
mujhe andar aane do.
God : next.
2nd : me doctor Hu. maine zindagi
bhar logo ki sewa ki
mujhe andar aane do..
God : next..
3rd : main Shaadi Shuda hu….
God : Bas kar pagle rulayega kya,
chal andar aaja…

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Aaj subah bhagwan ne ‘dabangg’ dekhi aur
mood me aa k kaha,
‘Hum Aaj aisa mausam banayege ki confuz ho
jaoge ki sweater pehne ya raincoat’

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Newly Married Couple
Biwi : Aaj tum udaas kyu ho?
Husband : Meri Maa or Bahen alag ho gai hain.
Biwi : Koi baat nahin ab me aagai hun na,
Tumhari Maa Bahen ek kar dungi

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